I once knew this. How are you what the fuckers, what the bug bodies, what the buccaneers, what the fuck's echoes, what the fuck you bury pins? What the buckminster fuller is what the fuck why not throw the canadians and there I am mark marin. This is w e f. It's my show. It's the pod cast its where it's happening. Big show today who, by god, all right. So last week I talked to make jagger and about my brain open today I get on the phone keith richards who are in work, I love mick Jagger. I love the rolling stones, but Keith richards is my guy. Do you know what I'm saying and I talked to dean about- that I pulled dean back into it, pulled him over here. I felt like, since I talked to me that I could handle keith

think I did handle it for about nine minutes and then it was so. Do I guide, I don't I gotta go. I gotta go I can't take it anymore, So if I sit down with Keith in the room here or in a room at his house for an hour or so it would be fine, but just on the phone I was like there's so much. I don't I'm experience. Feelings, my heads about explode and I'm hitting a wall but there, but you can't tell you can't tell I tried to be cool, you know, and I told them where I was- and I asked him where he was that there was good. So that's look forward to that end. campbell and is also on the show. She's got a book coming out, she's, an actress as you may know, also she is the wife of the the wonderful david cross, but she's got this beautiful dark book of poetry coming out, dark spark or that comes out tomorrow. Talk to her before I forget, the machinations tour, starts Officially, on April night, at the world

theatre in Washington DC. There still view tickets for that left the truck there. philadelphia above shows are sold out. The wilbur embossed him as chooses might be tickets. For that second show on April, eleventh I mass in wisconsin tickets available April sixteenth at the barrymore theatre seventeenth in pittsburgh at the carnegie of homestead musical. I believe you can get tickets April. Eighteen, that the royal oak music theatre in royal oak mitch. Again, yes, you can get taken. Sunday april nineteenth at the bloomer pell toronto ontario early show sold out joe, might be tickets, not sure paramount in Austin on April twenty third You can still get tickets, which journals April twenty fifth, used and sold out April. Twenty south side musical dallas, you can get tickets, friday. May eight neptune in seattle, early show sold out, wait, show might be tickets. The vogue vancouver go, get your take Its please that's may now

may tenth data symphony. Somebody on San francisco, please bay area, go get your tickets to big place, Although I did tickets by its big ass place, Thursday may Thirteen, the orange people in Asheville north carolina early, show sold out later go, get your tickets, asheville may fifteenth job the musical trousers, I've carolina, go, get em view taken, we saturday may sickening variety playhouse, lana few tickets laughed get em, they may seventy joy theatre, new orleans. The regime to go, get those tickets So that's the way our right now right, I just want you to know that up. can do hard, emmy, ok, good yo. On times Ask me. after the Louie episode right. So that episode my have so what louis we k they did. A few years back

was voted the need the best podcast ever in the history of pipe cast by us late. So oh yeah, I every once in a while your people I mean guy you're. What's going out the amu you're right, you move, we all right. and, as you know, louis has had me on his show. The last two seasons for an episode that would indicate that we're all right. But then The weird thing happened on stage and I was at the comedy store and I was doing well at a good week. Last week I was feeling confident feeling excited my comedy was going what had the right head space that daddy? I can get into most of the time, but sometimes it's fleeting, for some reason. I was I'm very good weak and I was stage in the original room at the comedy. Store must have been thursday night. Maybe having was Wednesday and I'm like that

the way the comedy store works. Is you go on and then you bring up the next guy and sometimes it's a guy on the list, but sometimes that guy might not be here. So generally you asked Jeff the piano guy. You know who's up next, so I about done? couple more minutes- and I said, Jeff who's up next and usually I'll just tell you- this time. You watch over with a piece of paper hands it to me. The special gas I look at the piece of paper is louis E k so in that moment I say: oh yeah, this guy, I know Guy I've been going and united gonna do a few more minutes she doubted will bit. I'm gonna work on some new bits right now, just being funny being a deck ivy, so I was kidding, but it what was struck me was there was another time career where we are those guys would come in the room like back when I was starting out new york and I was finally getting spots at the comedy seller. If I do the tower louie would Did the room I would tell get out, I would.

Fuck, my set up, because in my mind, I'm not doing it for the comics, I'm trying to figure out how to perform regular people. So if I said come in. I do I get out. I don't want to deal with the pressure there. If I saw we come in, I be coming just let me do this by myself police but die was it was an amazing sign of growth in friendship for me that I really wasn't threatened. intimidated earlier or fell, judge jury nervous. I did a couple more men I brought louie up- and he told this story- bout me that I had forgotten about, which is always nice to hear story about you. He said he loved me and that we are buddies and it was very nice. They told us, worried that completely forgotten about and I don't I don't know how he I must have told him or maybe was he was over the morning that I you know they came by the day it happened, but I used to live in york city I used to live on second street, between a and b in nineteen, eighty nine, so

the giuliani reign of of control and and we state had not occurred yet He was a heroine street and there was a heroine doorway, literally right next to my apartment, there was is doing store. I think it was a bookstore. Next to it was a bodega type store but they were selling heroin out there and there be point guys any aside the street to manage a car and have little cause and whistles. Let, though junkies when to scatter and when the dealers no one to scatter, I ultimately ended up buying heroin in that doorway after a year and a half sobriety and then finally going, I gotta see what that's like that: Is it quite an ordeal you got to go through the main guy, two guys at the door and then there's another guy inside and then a basket comes down. You put money in the basket goes up. It was quite an ordeal glad that didn't stick.

oh, why, anyway, so in front of this fake store this front this, random bookstore swash bodega was apart spot that he pretty much new, not to parking. The guys would run their little onto bikes that they are those old, japanese motorcycle says some guys involved be screaming up and down. reach at all hours you're gonna, you just impart there. It was unknown thing will one day in I was driving around looking for a parking space. I had a car. You know some of us held onto that dream in new york for a while, but I also to go up north the work, it does not get any. Work in new york, I just doing sats at the comedy sound maybe if I was it that point, but I have to drive up to boston new england area. They get paid work every week, and so, it will be w golfing and one that I was driving around and around and could not find a parking space, and I just fuck it I'm park in the drug space. What could happen

I'll get it in the morning. So I part there. I get up the next day I go out in my tyres- are flat and theirs standing around the dude that work at the drug space. The rod doorway dude hang around and I come out and I will get my car and the gaza, your car man, my gear, their like d mass sad what happen man what happened? So it's fucked up right and it is on those things work I knew did it, but I had it there and go yet it's that some of them my tyres in there. I guess yeah. Maybe you should a park there right yeah. Well yeah. I just live right here. I know so you should know you shouldn't park there. I wonder who did this and I'm like? Okay? Alright, I get it, I get it so. I straw dogs, you know.

the movie and I got out so do you know where I get some tyres? I get some tyres on this thing, so I can work as a guy around the corner and then I don't know why these basic you keep an eye in the car go round. want to start run around the corner. This tired joint to get a few spares see. Viking. Adam that come back rounded. To that around from the place or now in my car, going through it going through my glove compartment am I a k, a my here? Do we and my car, and I guess I marriages keeping an eye on it for you just one most humiliating horrible things If that ever happened to me that didn't you know that didn't hurt me dramatically, but it was just yeah what a horrible feeling- and I changed the tires but I'll tell you the moral that story don't park. In that space I did not. That again, my word my lesson. So

we did a good spy, did some new staff, and afterwards we talked in reconnecting knee, was leaving town a couple days and from a recently It was funny because I heard from her- I guess it was on his way back to new york the plain and he took a picture of the united entertainment options, and there there is a louie and then there is something else. Then marin like right next to each other, just text at the screen. What the amazon it and he said, life is fucking bizarre and I it out united. He goes yup, I said wild. That's actually doing. Where people can see my show. and he went ha, but speaking I show. Let's talk honestly, at the minute, because I'm going I'm going to I'm going to pitch this again as well my show marin, the third season premiers on I see on may for now. I know a lot of you watch it on. for a year or so later,

I know some of you watch it. You bite on itunes and others. Couple of other ways to watch it. Other than I see, but I would urge you and I'm not this guy, but I'm gonna, be this guy, be nice. If you don't have, I have see maybe pick it up for a couple months during the running of my show, as it would be nice to get some numbers there You know, I'm glad you, everybody watches my show. However, you gonna watch it that's fine. But if you watch it on, I have see then ratings happen and that determine whether or not we do more or or whether or not we're success on that network. I think look. Oh that's all timey by day. Can find it in your art to pay by of sea fur, four may june and July thou. That would be very thou, be me and you can watch my show as it happens in real time and they will be running marathons

funds, how we want to say the leading up to the premier, the third season of the first two seasons. I say you ve, been you ve been asked, politely, ok, right. I'm about to share my interaction with the previous to the cave. Richards call am I conversation with really, I would say the biggest hero. I've. Had my wife said: I can remember having heroes, Keith Richards Listen to me. Try to keep my cool and talk about guitars with with fucking keep, church and he sounds great, he sounds great. So, as you know, if go tour let's go on sale next Monday April thirteenth for the stones, but you can get this wednesday, if you're an american express card member awry, So here we go. What's let's get in, the lead up and the phone call with my hero, teeth, richards

and so did the rest folks, glittering Keith workers can be on a phone what time? Oh, couple of what here whoa, okay, hello Mark keep richards, I'm great man. How are you I can't believe, you're calling us Are you a doctor talk to me last week, and he asked me if I am going to talk to you, and I said I was here, and here we had a nice conversation, how you guys get along right, time under israeli soldiers

pairing a to the road you know, and what do you guys do any rehearsing like every day or what couple of days, not not in the moment will be, will be repetitive in a couple of M, I'm not sure where yet, but a great where you are now I'm in connecticut run it so we in an average day you sit around play for it. While yeah every day is a little bit. You know depends as to when the mood grabs me. You know sometimes the piano you know, sometimes if the kids are and what what are you playing big like one of those gifts in the hummingbird, the big, the big gibson's up at home. Now I got to capital a little m, martin and and and and and a little angel guitar. Oh, that's sweet yeah! They're ready to just nicer around the house, you know: what's your what's your main guitar when you're going out now, where I play

and did the usual line up man. My my telecast is and are a couple of gibbs it was pretty much the same thing. Ah ever since. Ah, I can't remember when I didn't have them, you know: do you do you still play with that? You still take that fifty to tell you that, oh yeah, sure that is my mainstay yeah, that's awesome man, so so the store I do have a few dates and they're all going to be big, but that sticky fingers reissue. That's pretty exciting excited about that yeah and it's magical zip code. You know the two of us are famous, yeah Extend is coming out, I'm, not sure how you know, I'm a maybe relieve and I try and play the whole damn thing on stage. You know that I

at that, because I heard a rumor that you guys are going to do that and he was like. I don't know if we're gonna, if it's gonna good, I don't know what we did is an idea. I wouldn't know till we get into rehearsals. What what's the fear? Do you think you just don't know which songs you are going to click with again. What determines that? No, you gotta wait until you're, actually altogether and just playing. You know before you can really make decisions like that. You know that the elder gave everything a bash or not and how you're learning moonlight mile again right now. I know that's going to be amazing how about sister morphine yeah on top of that yeah we are about. When I wanna go down, I think I'll yet, and I mean my brain, in dollars in here and we are listening to talk- is cheap? How come you never lie? Idea? I think about playing any of those tunes where you know the registers know I mean as a separate thing. You know I'm

it is and to know talk turkish tree by and by I love the rhinos and yeah. It's a great, regular, great record when you guys go out what? What? What's? What's your regiment, I mean like you were just going to you're, not going you're going to go on a bus. You guys still do with buster. No, no, not a river plain yeah, yeah fuck, the bus right. Yeah. That is quicker than that, although actually a a sometimes a, we do take a bus just for the fun of it. You know it depends depends on the ride. You know what distances and the servants united said. Oh let's take a little afternoon and ride it by bus the country. You know, sir man, why not? Why is this? It is nice to see that jerry when you're not being chased. So when our charlie doing you guys are right

I spoke to him the other day as if what you do- and it is I'm packing. and right he's, ok here can in fine shape man that goodness I asked Myka, because I always wonder why cause I I actually haven't seen you guys, wives in nineteen, eighty one of the madison square garden- oh well, you're in there, but I was wondering like do you ever when you're up on stage? Do you ever like catch yourself like looking over your shoulder to see if bills, air the miss bill and. Yeah. Well, I miss him in any way. You know as well as a mate, but I do it without jones mandates Well, I you know a you know, I'm enjoying so much playing with him and I status says. Even though he's the new boy he's been with us twenty years, that's a wild man, Now I will let you do you actually hang out lapel macartney, sometimes

I sure they're going to do just a little here and there yeah did you ever think about. Did they never come up where you thought? Maybe we could. together with all the often that are often comes up, but we never got around to another very many still untouched uh. I haven't seen shots good for awhile, then I just send him or send him a note a couple of weeks ago- But the aside, I know, is right and are you thinking about having some guest players on the tour you have. You got anybody in mind, yeah, I I guess I I I I I think Equally, I haven't thought about it and may I thought maybe mic might have mentioned more than that, because I don't really get into that and until What are your favorite songs to play? How's? It feel the play moonlight mile again, oh, that the fun. You know, I mean it's a been awhile and I'm the favorite.

Yeah! I do. I could play jumping jack flash or not yeah. Do you ever listen to as as as as make about it, you know cause. I I've been following. You guys a long time and I bought my first telecaster because of you and I started smoking cigarettes gosh you, you changed my life as they are drinking. At Dana's, because you and then after I did all that Keith. I learned how to play guitar started with the other stuff, I do to that's one way of so but like would you got you out for me do you go when you what kind of record us into every once in a while? You go back to the blues, oh yeah, yeah? so I always Who, who are making a weak dose of the blues for the channel and radio channel the blues shut down, or I start to go through the odds? Are you know, pile of records and stuff, and ah

yeah, always listen to Robert Johnson, muddy waters or listen to all those cats all the time. So do you ever think about like putting out straight up blues record? I know all the stellar records or blues records on some level, but yeah Everything is driven down. I didn't you know it's an idea. That's always been lurking in the background with stones, but I If anyone is, they got the boers for it to be afraid of Keith. What's what what are you? That's what I think I mean hey. Maybe it's just a matter of time. You know it might be or might be, the right time to do it and then the next time we get in the studio yeah, why the hell not so yeah. So now, what do you? What are you doing to prepare just rehearsing you're, not you're, not you're, not doing push ups or anything are you

I know, die weight, isn't op's to get on the stage. That's enough exercise! I don't do anything particular, but I you know I'm in pretty good shape. You know you sound great man, you sound great youtube what is that tuning? You still play most. We five strings right. It depending on the song. I mean. I guess it's about the fifty fifty ready or when it comes down to it and what's your favorite stones, record gate. a a rough one, to pull on me. Man, I'm sorry, but you know when you know a gimme shelter. I'd have, yeah yeah yeah midnight I could go on then, but out you know. Maybe gimme shelter for this time Well, you know keys. I knew not what to say this. This conversation, my changed my life

I am not again. Maybe we're all looking forward to the tour is great talking to you, man, okay, you too, and take it easy. Bye, bye, see ya, oh man, what the hell just happen do those index the level dude wow what they'll just happened anyway, I think I pray could adopt a longer now I know I know I let let go to gruber going wrigley regard. Now there was enough right now is awesome. Dear Poli fuck the I think I think that down when pretty well by can have a longer conversation with them at another time. That's all I could say, but it was funny- and I I almost I almost exploded. I almost exploded. I hope you enjoy that

I don't have a lot of you. People know this, but I was a poet. I did some very important poetry work. Bow and just shit, my pants just coffee, deco up available deputy of pod dotcom, a classic, add that they I decided to impulsive. We do with them that that moment, classic diabetes, what can I say that yeah I was a poet I I did. I I thought that I was going to write poetry, not for a living necessarily but but as something that seemed to be the the clearest waited the truth for me. At a time back when I was in high school, in college, I edited the undergraduate literary general journal. One year I was published in it twice: in writing, poetry. I still do it occasionally I enjoy Eating poetry and I always knew poetry to read and I've talked about poetry, the show before in the woman of work

I think she's, an editor of her poetry or the journal sent me a bunch with a with a actually a post, its the pages of the guy. She thought I would like I did like it. I like reading poetry, so when amber tumbling, reached out to me and said she's going to write a book poor child, like yeah mamma, said she was gonna, write if she'd written it. Now, as I push Let's talk about poetry, so so I'm I'm excited too to share this with you. It's me and amber camp when the actress and poet talking about her new book dark sparkler, which comes out tomorrow, for those who live in the area here should be at the hollywood forever cemetery on April. Twenty. Fourth: for release event with the overall tango that band yeah to let you be so here now me an amber, I am in work, and I see you again.

Mozilla shoe, maybe three or four times. Yes, never had a conversation with you now tugged, yes, acted like a high smoke, my friends girlfriend yes, you're, a girl there that guy yes, while there was this, is it yeah happening now? Yes, you ready. Yes, we ve been here for to day in los angeles or your parents are correct and you you childhood home yeah, that's right, born and raised in venice the same place down there that their living and is still the same apartment yeah same place or that they ve been there for thirty three year. Thirty, five years. I think so. It's like well worn old furniture, arden books very much I'm here. What kind of name is tat, one it's welsh ha, and what is that Your background is, I don't know mostly scottish, very scottish, and you can see that as soon as I start drinking drinking bourbon, oh yeah, what happens there just get very

I mean? Can you are you incomprehensible in terms of how you speak? No, I just get like flirty and mean and have worse comment. I think. Maybe I saw you once like that yeah right now, I'm nervous. So both still down their gathers? we're still there married yes still married here, really yeah after all the sixties, ah yeah! Well, I you know, and what came out of that was actually my dad they're both on their third marriage, so they were both married twice before they. At and during in between or during one of those two marriages. For my dad, he actually a had a daughter that he never knew about that came knocking on the door one day when she was seventeen. I was, I think, like seven. his old or new china should my sister who never knew about her, and the reason is because her mother really didn't want to tell her daughter, because her father was a womanizer at that time, which was your dad

yeah- and you know at that time in the sixties was all free love and well, who are married, also had mistresses edges was you know and your devils like right in the middle of it right. He was part we. Let's talk about for many years, was part of the studio system. Yes, very myself, and and then he just went rogue like the entire industry right yeah, he did he was ass. He was under contract, MGM and he'd been acting since he was nine years old and went to school the m gm lot with Elizabeth taylor and do just p hadn't. Credible life and then the sixties. And and he met Dennis hopper and neil young, and you know they all moved up in topanga canyon and who's part of that crew. Oh yeah, big time. Those are my. I was there, my god debts dummies, neo, young and now I've. Instead, he still dumb who, which one dennis out Dennis both of those guys you're gonna dead. So what They party your life, your whole life,

Dennis much more when I was really younger, neil and dean. Stockwell really were more around a lot growing up in, and Niels daughter is one of my very close friends or both named amber rose and God remained with him, yes, yeah, let's noisier he seems like a pretty earnest authentic guy that neil young fella soda stockwell, actually yeah they're they're they're complicated dudes yeah. what makes him interesting so in Houston, acting when you were a kid yeah eleven on a soap. Yes, now shot here. Yeah was the only soap shouting. No, there was a was a our general hospital there's a couple of them think, I honestly don't know that's one of those things too. I think he will assume because you are on a soap opera that you know other one soap operas so I'll always have someone can ring do you know why

you know gold, whether smith from one life to live like who the fuck is that awesome name is eleven yeah. That was like. No, I don't. I don't know, I'm not buddies with everybody else from soaps. Was it you like, like I read, I read a good portion of the book and I read part the back part, which seems more autobiographical. The epilogue handling, I've, I've read some poacher have written symposium, my life, I like it, some of us a little painful and That is a little were dark. I know they're dead, that there's lots. Two within it, but the meditation on the death of actresses, particularly young, actresses, over the course of the history of show business. You are right you're actually talking to a go straight now: you're, ok, I'm dead inside.

They are I'm I'm good this. This book was but got me there. You know that was the that's the exorcism right, their dark mark or yes, but what like, been acting since you're eleven and having success added throughout in doing big and small, some television movies and having brought up in it even on the emails you shared the back the book will your father, What was it that create the meltdown. Well is in thing, because I thought that I was writing a book about the lives and death of child star, actresses and and actresses that heads succumb to death in one way or another, whether it was suicide or they did murdered or whatever before the age of forty and and and what it originally started out as and just in the research of it and the research of these women time. The book took six years to write

and so about three three years and after studying am I really started to travel and I was sort of thinking that I was studying them from a distance and I really wasn't it all. I was in a way studying myself because I was studying interior lives of these women. And learning so much about them and seeing a lot of similarities and also sense of when? Are you allowed to ask yourself the question if you ve been acting since you were that young? When are you allowed to ask yourself the question whether that's actually what you really want to do or not, and I had no- asked myself that question, and so until I started writing this book in that. Well, I'll do thirty one, well that's good, it didn't happen when you were forty, maybe you're, going to avoid the fate right. I I I do feel like the book be in in it you know in its study and in its journey actually was a death for me. which is what I had to embrace- I think in western culture there's so much and- this on death is a very negative

It's is a very little thing and that a few contemplating released its final thing, yeah yeah, but also that weren't supposed to think about it, talk about it you wanna say you're interested in that it means something to you all and for me this was this writing this was the shedding of of skin and was the death of me as it old actress. You know, which is something that had been really hard in. My adult life was separating myself from that and seeing myself as an actual a walls and treating myself that way so we'll show business like the one thing they can run through them? can also imagined through your life, and I think, probably through your father's, specially somebody coddled by the studio system. Yeah is that there is idea validation. There is this parental sort of almost it's, not even godlike, but it it's sort of. Why do I look pretty? Am I doing good, like there's this weird, almost like its infantilism

it's very much us it's very much. Culture projecting onto people. I mean that's. What celebrity celebrity ism is, and that's also what these people have have experienced to a certain extent, as well is justice that you are a you are projected upon, and you also for a living project. So you that's what you do is you are not yourself for living and then your personal life. You are also not allowed to be yourself because everybody else is going to look at you and tell you and treat you they have their own relationship based on their idea correct, but but but just the fact that, like much of being an actor is about validation. That I get it always sort of strikes me even like I used to do Joe grace, who say it took me years to learn the hollywood. It wasn't my parents that, like your sword, like you, you like that, waged it's weird doke as like. When you call your manager, you call your agent or you're trying to go out on things. Like the conversation,

is like email? Am I good? Was I good enough for my you know? Am I funny? Do you love me and it's so it maintained, and I think the entire culture is infantilizing on some level, but to be an actress and being that that at rare air of being insulated and protected like that, there's the outside and the inside of the individual and what people bring to it, but there's also weird emotional relationship with the fuckin business. expectations like is it me a lot of that the sad and do a lot of these people psychologically. just the nature of being abandoned We are by themselves and by the business in a way. Really is abandonment of the self. That's your touching on exactly what was what I learned drew out of all of it, which was just this idea of you know and even in the writing of the book, as I was writing about dead actresses and I was drinking a time and I was taking on purpose on purpose and taking his many pills are like things that I thought was gonna get

closer to them and understand what about writing driving yo by thought that that was? great choice, and in trying to say what does it feel like to be that numb? What did it feel like for them with didn't help me write shit? It didn't help at all. It just made me out of my mind Really, how no it doesn't. I was not. It was not very charles bukovsky about it to touch me not with you. Do you work for me, might work for that guy, but I was like I think that was the forging of yes, but The life has gotta, be the first love. If you're going to live that life, you can't just kind of dabble in it yeah exactly. You should become a real drug, addict yeah, but I kept telling myself kept saying. Why is this happening to me? Why is all of this stuff happening to me. Why is you know why can't hey. Why don't I want it? Why am I not killing in my auditions anymore the way that when I was a kid I just I could kill, I could walk in a room and kill it. Why was

happening. Why wasn't I getting you know the jobs that I wanted that I go in, and I thought I killed four, why every vulgar was happening to me and I wasn't happening to anything else and the realization and the study of that and this and an it. You know by proxy, studying all these women was that there was unequivocally true and that I was not taking on shit for my own life because for so many years I had no identity in a certain sense. since there is dad that. And nurtured? I didn't know how that supposed to get nurtured- and this is from a chick with awesome pair if you still married and cool and whatever and had a great artistic upward and even myself, within myself in my mid twenty was, I was thinking who am I I've lived, I've already lived and lights, and I'm only like twenty five years old, and I I want to quit and I want to end. I would like to end. I would like to know what it feels like to cease,

I became a very attractive mantra to me, that sounds like I'm sorry I was suicidal or something but that's not. It was just that this and of stopping of of shopping, we ve been going for so long right and also without with having a fragile sense of self. I've talked about this about suicide a ruminations in and I I did Adam bees- we bring up my jokes, but I think maybe you would enjoy them I used to say that it's not that I I don't want to kill myself. I just find it relaxing to know that I can write if I have to well. That's a really beautiful way of looking it's the spiritual reprieve of a faithless person and a very self centered person It's not so much. I like a real suicidal people. They re kind of mean business gap by dead, those of us who just eight there, it's easy theirs. It there's a there's, a difference between

I want to be done and, like you, a deep sense of sadness for yourself here very much oh, what Jesus Christ in and in which it was them, is that you know that that idea rise. Everything happening to me and why are all these things going wrong lies in what way is in Why isn't it happening for me was the real right, but the truth of the matter was that I needed to stop that the that that that's, what was dead, Universe was telling me in there. I will. I was telling myself you are. Nothing is bidding for you here, because this this is dead to you. This action will not even acting but the machine in which I was brought up in the way in which I was brought up in which was kill in an audition room and was to have no opinion other than to like know how to kill. Addition room and that's it all. I knew how to do and It was my way of saying you will not survive this because he theirs much more. I wanted to do and we are direct. I wanted to write a book.

it's important that was that showed why, kind of right, or I could be that island. I wanted these things. I just didn't know how to make them happy and so instead it was just like. Oh just keep doing the same thing, you're always doing which is don't try to, outside of the box, don't try to be bigger, or better or roof to yourself that you can do more and an ultimately that's exactly. What I needed to do was to stop acting for a fuckin minute. Just take a damn breather ya. and then everything started to change sure when he's like he sort of thought, you know how you take a breather and you stop and you realize you have to stop giving a shit for whatever reason right. That's when everything starts to happen, yeah when you're right pocket Can you really believe it, but like two separate from that idea like because it must have been that thing it's it's like. I know it from being a kind of mid level, celebrity myself, and I just achievement who have on this very well,

so a year, you rely on like your constantly making those calls why why why? What Am I going in on that? Why am I not going out who's going in on that? Why is that? And when you yourself, I would imagine, run shit, through your mind, now emerged, backed you what a fucking waste of life yeah, what a waste of time yeah it's it's a sense of just hitting. You know hitting a war all over and over again and dumb, very much what I was doing I was, I was cutting off my nose to spite me I was telling myself. This is all over amount to right, because I don't have any control right. I don't I don't. I can only do that. I can only make the phone call my agent and put everything into their hands and go rise in this working out wise and is happening in the news story. Did a few, you started that dear friends or something yeah well, I mean

in the book. You know I was with an agency for a huge agency for fifteen years and I member. This was right around the time I took like, I said, the books, here's to write and I took a year often there and it was right this time is also when David and I got married, was really weird. Fuckin year was an awful awful awful year. The year we got married, that we always look good part of it. Everything else. Elles was terrible had like a party with an agency that was terrible, didn't care about the you know, care less about the movie that I had written that you know. I had there it's for that I had financing relationships and had people attached like Alfred Molina and janet terror, and there is like no sense that they care yeah in December. It's fucking, awesome, when's, it coming out still editing it It's almost were almost done where molina yeah and you directed it I drafted, I wrote it, but I

didn't that didn't happen until I left that agency they're not going to do anything they're not, but you just that's exactly right when you start treating them like friends and that's the wrong thing to do, but Also, when you, I think, a kid actor europe, it's a boundaries with other adult with adults so blurred and end. You also are cons, we're trying to get approval later, I do good and the scene right. I I knew all my lines, you know, there's a real terrifying sense of boundaries, the dolls and so that something I very much took into my adult life. In my around that time, which is high, I could have stayed for so long with people that did not care, but also your your dad was in it yeah. I guess like there is sort of like and it it broke his heart and like you, I can see that just in in that it exchange which which should be sort of uplifting emotions, emotion, injuries, basic idea, your great neo get, maybe it'll be a comedy next time, but it's horrible now way

You know what I mean like because he knows it. So intimately he knows the heartbreak. He knows the disappointment. Yeah he's been through it all before. Yet he's not able to tell you like get out Jesus get the fuck out did he ever say that I but you know he also, for him it was really painful because he, you know, went back to japan, genesis these did all that many tried to cut. When he had me any married, my mom he tried to get in acting again in the eighties and nobody knew who he was because he had been gone for twenty years fifteen years before twin peaks, way before twin takes I mean he he had been gone for anywhere from ten to fifteen. Was he doing he was into paying? he was doing art, use part of the seminar culture move many b and he's a beauty. Collage artist, artists he's he's at work all over the world and its way so dedicated the book to him, because it's important that and my dad at eighty years old sees that that's not

only thing he is just because that's what he's most known for acting he's he's also working on a biography for ten years and, as I wrote a dedicated to him author, because that's what matters near that he also not except his own pigeonholing right and knows that he is a value beyond and beyond that part of his life, the acting yeah. It's so bizarre, it's so specific how how it fucks with your head yeah. No, I even in that piece about like when you were a kid in error at that party or something, and we needed to capua was area as a true story than I worry. What that it was your first kiss night air, but the detail, though, is interesting. Is that your dress like a chill out, because you sort of this prior to that, like there's a weird thing when we arrive in venice terminals or my only friends right but like theirs, but that sense of of wavering identity. Yeah, oh yeah, you know, fact that you got into acting

so young and you weren't supposed to sorted, become other people for a living. But you know, took the time or you never had the. Does the inner workings too to be good with yourself childhood is true, is also a real time of introspection, its roots. Really when you're sick was to be went when your inner life is. finding itself here and you're who you who are who you want to be very much defined by the hour, of your life and end by the relationships you have with people, and I just didn't, have normal versions of that. What driver mine were We're always trying to appease adult son a job that might you know that none of my friends here that I had to be responsible for I pay the bills. I mean that's. That was my life and how there were your folks, it I mean where you into pangaea. Now and now that was too pangaea was thing for my dad like in this sixty

so you're your parents, so he married to your mom for a little longer than you've been alive. Yes theyve and they'd yeah, they moved you and venice, with with actually with Dennis hopper and his and his then wife in the early eighties. Like eighty, seventy nine something like that hover like that must have been old. They have him around here, an old buddy. You might think one of his daughters. I don't know which one or from which- there are a couple of when I use He's got he's got some. You got he's, got some kids, and Henry his son is a is a real sweetheart and I haven't seen. seen henry sense since then died, and it was a very tough ending for him I ran into hand henry just randomly. I remember on em Kenny. I had seen him in maybe ten year.

And we just ugh each other and cried on the street I mean I hadn't, seen the kid and so long, and I just who is really wild, well there's a very like it. It's the type of childhood you guys had- is so specific, yeah. It's like you can run into anybody. I god when we were kids. We all did this because that crew of people that new grew up with those parents who were out of their minds in the sixty reactors near and the way that all that changing specifically show business there's only like How many of them are? You is the small crew really yeah. I would imagine- and I dont know I actually dont know any other. I dont have friends that are like I know, rashid jones, but I don't really know her that well, but I imagine she had some version of thy life. We don't. We ve never talked about that. I dont know there's no there's no crossing over of you like this

opera, kids, you re right regret these worlds into themselves. Met quincy jones consumers having you die now I go and then we, talk to these people they're, like yeah he's just my dad, and I know he can can't be real, this guy, that guy so there's no way his dick made, you no way, which is where do you get these ideas? because in the minds of civilians, who are these people sort of immortal there like their day, the area I you know this way for me to even ass new young is just a guy, even though their view tons of people here, I'm still sort of like when he was sitting across me. You'd just would be why below He always shit, but they also I have to just be guys yeah, you know, and and these guys do people find the time to do the work and then they'd just eaten go the bathroom, like other people wander around yeah. that's what I was trying to say in my book. I get it. Again, let me really drive at home, for you mark, ok,

Twond like out of all these are guy to look up. Some some of them are fake too, and that this is She must be thrilled about that. That's the number one question I get for interviews is, that is, a mark is holding up my book to me and tease showing me the poem for each beach poem is titled after the actress. So this ones lindsey low hand, and it's just a blank page, not very optimistic well so a question to you would be. What does that mean to you were? think it's very optimistic. you know. Like my, I think I feel that, like I dont like this sordid tabloids, zation of things that much It is part of every by those who, like us, being a sober person myself with some I like her they're there, because there's just this part where you ikea, you could use the the you don't have to go down like this. However, it's going to go down but they've been saying this.

Years about her he's getting his there's no way he can Enron, they're, probably not going to end well, but it could go on for longer than anyone anticipated. Were you like when you were eighteen years old like where you a nightmare, Now I was very sensitive. I don't. I don't think I became a nightmare until about twenty one right. I'd say that when your husband, David cross, never hurt him met me in college, bald. Yes, what you, I think, he's that's him on the sides, but but I and other places he's very man. It's guy he's not really like that, like not italian harry, but he's got that weird nipple here. Right think he hasn't nipple here. Ok, one thing and another guy that I knew back in the day that that saucer named David cross of nipple hair, no he's weak on the beach dave, and I with a group

people? I kind of remember that I thought I remember that. Maybe I wonder if, if he laid on the beach and got sunburned, and then I shaved his whole body, if it would just he's got on his shoulders. He doesn't unhindered. real. I mean these cuts on his chest and my stomach. I think it's on his stomach right, scattered it scattered a remedy. what was the point being I met day when I was in college and he was in college and know how we just went from linsey allow hand to we're getting there my husband's chest, hair. I was just a few easy steps you're asking me. How was I when I was eighteen I can. I was telling you that I didn't start losing control my life until because talking about wednesday at the right where you're going it is, and I brought it up to say that what she was has gone through when she went through a teenager is insanely normal. There was nothing about the behaviour that was different, weird strange when was her age. When I was sixteen, I when I was twelve thirteen, I crashed my parents car. I got nipples peers

Sixteen, I wasn't nightmare knows that I was a crazy kid me, that she'd there is nothing like easy about her other than she just was living the life of a real teenage girl very, very, very publicly right, so my reasoning for putting not poem in their like that was to say, I'm not going to project on you what body else does and I'm gonna let people project on this page what they feel. It's really sort of a statement about that exact. About how we sort of look at someone and go. Here's your fate, you're going to be this you're going to be that you know you're going to end this way because she's ultimate the ultimate personification of that right, right: bribery like in the context of this book. It's not a nut It doesn't seem like right, but the book isn't just about deaths is also about glamorous nation and projection and how people are treated as objects. So in that vein, it's my stuff meant. That was just like I

I'm gonna write the poem for you. were you die, but I'm gonna put your name in here because the everybody else does so I'm I go down the same road, but I'm just not going to say what your ending is going to be. I'm not going to do that to you, whereas everyone else is like she's, probably going to die in a couple of years. Let's be honest: okay, I get it a bro outside of all those other themes at me, most of these it doesnt animal for anybody in here really does it might well for her now, but I'm talking and all the tone of the book I mean you know exploration was what happens to these women and what did you find ultimately like, as you did all this research in some of the stuff at the end of the book, where you showed that did what you had to certain what the research was yeah, how? How were you not going to become more depressed, and I was depressed and horrified and and and what was dave doing during all this? Was he worrying worrying about me and You know he. I even have a palmprint for him and there were he's any. Did a white foam yeah

sweet yeah, what he says, and he did say to me. I remember when I was halfway through it searching dead actresses. Many said: don't please don't get obsessed, and at that point I was far far into obsession land a minute through just no turning back. you couldn't define what the session was. What was it exactly? That was driving you? What was the more fascination. What were you did you think you are going to arrive, that I it was an admiration of their deaths. I was an admiration of the idea of non existence of stopping. You know when go back to that same theme. It was like you know and and and the idea of of. Being immortalized in that way. Why? Why didn't know from so many of these now one when I started looking people up, I think the first one I looked up was that with Judith piracy. So, sir hats, bird, all horrendous and I'm like I don't know if I can do this whole book right now- it's tough.

In some of these women who live longer and had wandered careers? Then then, just childhood action, it's very true and there's some of them. I like Frances farmer. She doesn't. She doesn't technically fall into the guidelines of what the book is, which is women around my age that died, which is ultimately what the whole thing is. I wasn't gonna write about anyone in their forties or whatever the hell that had lived. You know that thirty in the thirties felt like those that was the group of women and end thirty below. Where was the group that interested me, because that's what I was closest to so that's what I could relate to right, but Frances farmer. You know she died in her late fifties, but a lot of people She was in and out of mental institutions for a very long time when she was younger and there you know she's infamously someone hoop actually was libitum ized. So had this crazy idea of what? If what? If I wrote a book I'm from the idea that France's farmers been dead and she was twenty, eight years old and now she's, just a zombie and walking on a red carpet with like her pieces of it.

body parts falling off and no one recognizes there just like france's what are you wearing and she just you know, there's like black worms coming out of her mouth and which is kind of you know. Sometimes I look at red carpets. I look at these women if you squint, I can see the worms yeah, who are my peers and it's like you know, everyone's just trying to get back to their birth weight. You know it's like it's insane yeah. You can see right through him yeah, it's scary. sometimes yeah, it's it's. A little disturbing air did show business man yeah what the fuck fucked up. It is right. Let's go through more these Jane mansfield, how brittany murphy that was said, yeah that was the first that I wrote really that outward started out as the catalyst did, you know her, I didn't at all This book was a complete accident. I wrote this piece for brittany she's the only one in the book who was a contemporary peer of mine, meaning I never

knew her, but we always one on the same conditions. The only time I ever was in proxy If her proximity to her was when we both went in for an audition for eight. My and she ended up getting a movie. But I remember she came out of the audition room and I went in. We pass each other, never matter, but I thought she was incurred billy, talented and the history surrounding her death. It still remains really fascinated me, and it also he also fascinating. That people move to LOS angeles specifically with the idea they want to become famous and somehow somehow, but she was. She was an example of somebody. If you read interviews with her all that stuff, she news and she was a little kid. She wanted to be an actress added. She wanted her mother moved her out to LOS angeles when she was young. She worked really hard. She got there and then, as most people do you know the same goes away? That's that sort of blast of beginning fame. When you first get it, it goes away and then your

of stock with whoever you are and what you ve turned into during time and either you hate that or europe. With it. You know what that takes a lot of work. So to me I wrote this. I wrote that peace sort of to say you know it was. It was a love letter and, in a sense to say from one girl who was born and raised here, who has a totally me with a totally different relationship with loss angelus than most people. Do I I hate it here. I don't feel lonely here. I don't. I don't get sense of you, know holly. the only thing that matters about loss angelus, which is opening creeping us you not to abandon, feel the creeping s as much ram to some He who lost their life there and then, after that I remember the scene, on the cover of people magazine in this long, silver s beautiful over dress. Just gorgeous totally immortalized ike, brittany, murphy. You know the life of a star

lost so soon, and I always right that shit right road and nobody wanted to talk about the epidemic of drug use, nobody, why nobody wanted to write about or talk about all the different drugs of things, or did. It was always salacious We really wanted to address whatever that fuckin relationship she was in whatever was going on there, what thou on there and because that's the underside of this machine here is that it as much as the the the glamour and the the movies and end the outside of it. There's am, I I would argue a more powerful dark side that that's being marketed even harder, yeah. I mean it it's like has just along with that article. I didn't want to cover that, but I beg guarantee you if you want to tee embassy or any of those other ones are all up an edge yeah in everything sites do either weird moment where I'm like, when they see doing. Like

side, hollywood, those kind of new area that do not supposed to do their work. That's it. I can't would be our words, they're the they're, the makers of the illusion. That's right! I dragged their garbage out into the world. That's right. Can we protect them somehow that's right if they're guilty of them guilty, but we're all guilty of that. I mean that's, that's part of it. You know it's getting me a broken heart. I remember when, when I you and I read her autopsy minaret and I read everything all these women. I've read all their autopsies, but her is and the way they found her a crumb up in the shower. Laying the ground and I just thought that is the most heartbreaking thing. I've ever heard heard of a girl who just follow her dream so hard. She followed it right into death. This lonely position in this law only way and she couldn't get work, and you know it's the worst case scenario. It's a thing you go to bed at night, dreaming ever happened to you like it's, your worst fear.

Is it? No one will want you anymore. heather a work had arrived. was in the movie. Poltergeist and actually heather and the other one. It's in there You know she says it sort of written like a movie in the I heather was an poltergeist with Dominic done. That's who it is he's dead to our elder sister, they were both road so where they were both in poltergeist, together area and Dominic done was murdered and had orourke died of some very strange like a long infection. Ammonia they weren't really sure, but she was very. Very young but there are building that movie together and they died. Sort of sort of close, I think, closely after each other live one. they built there, though the the candles, in the indian grail. Yes, that is it yeah. They shouldn't have done that yeah. That's cause nothing but pain for everybody

the other one in there was poor, those poor people, since the mistake said the other the one that killed me was the brigitte anderson, savannah peace and Bridget Anderson was an old. Was a child actress in a movie called and smiles misuse vary, but which has a very popular film, but she up and couldn't get work in her teens and taught in then committed not commit suicide on purpose, but did a ton of drugs and ended up, overdosing and dying, and then shall Michel. Wiser was a porn star, nay hurt her screen. Name was Savannah refused to do poee? Yes, and she shut herself in the head, but she was so interesting when I started researching her. The connection between these two women was

I'd read all this stuff about shannon and finally, We're gonna got is weird book is weird autobiography of her and I learned, which is why I wanted to cover her because she was Xena yeah. It was because many porn stars try to get out of the business and try to get into acting the porn straight- and so she was talking about that and she'd really tried hard before she killed herself to become an actress, and then there is one little quote: in the book where they say. Where do you? Where did you get the name savannah from? And she said? Oh, my favor movie growing up was savannah smiles. I loved movie about a young girl that runs away from home and that everyone comes and gets her and saves her, and you know her family comes in rescues, are lots of popery and if she had, only known the the to the irony of that connection. The sea it to see, these patterns unfold. When you don't

many work on your interior life. You know there might have been some different hope for her that I like to think that. But that's me Then that's my own projection, so you were really in it. You're really completely obsessed make connections, and also I started to write fake actresses- is to supplement away for me to get out my own thoughts and feeling about maybe things ben through, but also just the worst thing. I can imagine the worst thing I can make up in my head and underwrite up. on four. Thank god for the epilogue yeah. Sort of come out of it in our way like it would seem like the one part of it like you, you had to go out of your way to be like grounds yourself as well that the search, the search list as to which took so fucking long to put together? it is a series of every single actress that I could find in the you know now

our archives and across the world, and I had my sister and jessica and harbour collar. And for this woman who works the national archives I'll, try finding every single name in recorded history around the world of an actor of an actress who d before the age of forty and just to look them and not. So we did so I'd, be hard pressed for anybody to look at this book and but tell me a name that I forgot: that's not in there. They are every hour when we vote now, who's coming The book now, Well, no, but god forbid, someone says I know you missed The point in saying is that you know it all of them. You dont recognises that. So let's celebrity in that in the infamy of battle of that state of me, I know that celebrity of oh, my gosh. I didn't you know I didn't they are so I'm not being featured in their sir I'm. You know that attitude, none of it matters and that none of none of their celebrity deaths mattered. All that mattered was their interior life and and that

so giving voice to. That is in a way, some sort of post mortem healing? I think so. I agree with you or that at some point somebody will read it and go like while that's you know interesting way to look when did you start writing? Poetry, I started when I was for reels when I was twelve I'd written a poem called kill me. So much it's an early, feminist political. I just use the f word on your show. Tucker I can handle what the femme asked the smithy offshoot offshoot broadcast what the feminists yeah should. It suits if needed now it'll just be me and Kathleen Hanna and a bunch of dill. Does there you go. It was even a time it's in my first book, my first I put out three books now, but the first one was poems I written from age. Twelve till I twenty one man dumb, was very much a

an ode to my writing: mentor, jack, hersman who's, the poet laureate of san Francisco and another per I was raised around a lot of the beat poets. My dad was good friends with them, which one law ferlinghetti michael MC clore, die in de prima that hole when they were still alive, the ones that are still alive. That's right, that's right and so are San francisco guys yeah does Dupree move up there yeah she does and she wrote the foreword yearbook. She was also sort of like a like a biographer. The beats too wasn't she kind of. Was she always just now? She was and she did write a book called recollections, my life as a woman which is inexcusable ordinary yeah, yeah yeah cause. She was the only She was the only woman and in that way what a nightmare that must have been, or she was be now: like very, very tough italian. You know believe that man, a luxury sheets did not feel like she needed at anybody to help her raise her kids she'd kid. All different met any just like she

she's, the original feminist gangster, in my opinion, also mentioned, offered right that forward. I almost fell off my chair, the sweet forward, yeah, it's pretty sure of what the with uncle for glare larry ferland getting around there was no larry burlingame lawrence for bulgaria, I don't really know lawrence that well, he's he's an odd birds gave you a hundred now he is he key. I quote from my first book- and I remember when I met up with him with jack irishman atta at a coffee shop in in san francisco, and I said thank you so much for doing this. That is really sweet. I this quote is beautiful. I am so honored and he just looked at me. It was like you have really nice hair, okay. I don't know whether there is a poem they just like. I do know how to move on from that us at source for feminism.

thank you but the question. I am a quorum like the younger of their beats. It seems like he was. He was yeah. He is he's sam. You now they're, all there I'll get up there and who is your favorite who's, your favorite poet, and whose main repellent general just such a big question more modern or classic. Let me who do you read? I? Could you go back to back to Louise gluck of her. I go back to hey cock. He's one of my favorite writers. There's a guide free mcdaniel? That's really really really a fantastic writer, beautiful poet, but I love. Like Elizabeth barrett browning. I think I will an sexton she's to me, probably one of the most important poets,

I think you would really love a book called alien, vs, predator by Michael Robbins, now see I dunno any of these people do yeah. I e you would you of all people would take that care for sure. So I'm glad you are this it seems to have saved your life. Yes and these in some of the paintings or by david lunch and some are vital. There's David lynch, Marilyn manson marcel desire, my adrian to my. Does a lot of the uncovers of the new yorker, Kid koala my dad did one that's the one but the woman falling down the hollywood sign. As my dad's collage yeah I'd, so you came through this dave, your husband, no friend of mine, he's not please I'll call him Dave. Scanty david swampy slapping cross. Do. Did you ever combat? Does Combat around you now is that an old,

oh no you're, gonna, sloppy by down really now slap come on. now. You do. Oh man, I can't wait to come jennifer anniston! That's! I think that that's your nickname, I know slap was something that a few there was a few guys see. I think that's a mark rivers, John! Yes, oh yeah! Those are those will be slappy. But back that far. But what are you so he's east supported you throughout this good man? Yes, you see it's really difficult for me because, like we, if we have talked about cross it all, I got long I know cross frontier and- and I know you Didn'T- you know him like. No one else knows him, so you can see like even that poem. The wife, foamy wrote in here is very sweet, and I he's very sweep, I'm not gonna usually the swedish dave gets, is a crane concern yeah, it's everybody.

All my friends what especially any time a new friend meets him or you know when I was first introducing him to my friend where first stating that it never failed. Every single person would say afterwards. I don't think he likes me very much It is the most magyar great I've known him. For thirty years. I say that I still say that he's private and and he's he doesn't like hugging yeah and he just is he's a bull shit or in the sense that he's just gonna, suddenly become your friend just because you know his wife. That's is that of his feeling and he's that way about everybody? He just stir it takes for him to warm up, but then, when he dies me he's a most loyal person I know. So how is he he's good is good. and they're gone and they're gone on to her with the MR show think they're not.

on tour. They are shooting. They're, shooting a show they're shooting a new sketch, show really yeah with the same crew, everybody at the same crew. It's going to be. Is it called mister, show then you can imagine. This is gonna error by the time there, the bell that's known, but it's called with bob and David and its. I can't say what you know. We're thing it's on, but broker will grow, but that's not what you say, and every day that interview gave him I actually had to. I want to hear it our view on here and I had to buy your fuckin premium package that religious orders you just ask me for No! I I wanted to give you the dollar. Thank you. It's a real, it's a I I really I know it's a lot of myself, but I was so irritated just having to fill out a fucking thing like this is bullshit hours. Energy for you, I loved I called him afterwards and I said you know I,

so glad that you ask him about his dad. You know, and you guys heartbeat, it's a thing. He doesn't talk about again very private person and- and I think it's nice, because I think that people assume that he's a dick when he's he's, not he just can be cold and he just can not like. I said not warm up to you just because that's what people do I he he takes a minute the us to take a minute to really serious. He is gas. You know that unease, with a little a little cranky? Sometimes I don't think he's a dick. I think he's serious he's well cranky. He doesn't to entertain fools gladly or at all, and in and end I think, they're there is usually some sort of current of, prostration going on. There. Definitely is for sure, especially when he has to hang out with my friends and drake when he gets really irritated that there's where's, that movie but

Where is that documentary yeah? You got a documentary living in your house with you, yeah he's like can't. We just put on some nashville pussy. What is this shit ah dave and his music firehose I cannot keep track peel put something on the car went from the old those yeah punk rock data. I don't get it here, he's he's a character, but yes, now. What do you look back at your acting career with any sort of love o the precise yeah. I think I know where the high points for you. I appreciate it even more at, but I would say the sisterhood movies, because I got real friendships out of that and those girls were a were and are very, very good. Friends is that's a freak accident that it in that way, because normally you don't be theirs

he's like an undercurrent of jealousy, but you know competition beyond that? Never and with blake and american alexis. I would say that that that those movies were highlights for me for sure and do you like with new project and we did a lot of tv work. Do you have any tv work? I do I love it is, but you're, like a working actress person, yes, yeah, and- and I hope, to and and have been doing in the last couple of years especially since selling this book, and you know getting my film made of producing more in writing, more witches and direct, which is all I have now seen what I am capable of in a really great way, and I believe in myself, so I can't return ever back to the world of just auditioning, depending on the pupil and depending on it

bosnia, and I don't think that would have been possible to talk about the movie. What we were. Where did it come from? What's it about one, did you write it is an adaptation of a janet fitch novel. She wrote white oleander sows the novel short after that painted black which is about a young man, who calls himself in the two women he leaves behind his his girl for he's a sort of punk rock allay artist, you'd model you know, does all that cut taboo stuff for money. And his mother, whose very wealthy world famous concert pianist and these two women blame each other for his death and they are instantly, attempting to kill the other person it's got cigarette it's like. If Quinton tino directed great gardens, is it funny parts of it yeah heavy, it's her, it's heavy, but it's there are parts of it, funny, it's a melodrama. What was like directing molina means, a monster you hear me

Actor he's a good he's incredible he's just an. I am a monster in the like: yes, yeah yeah, You know it was, of course its nerve racking, but at the same time he's just such a generous person, and you know those type nationals as well, they come in JANET mcteer was like that as well. Just they come in they. They know which is how I was always raised and raised at hilarious. How I always went into work and was knowing all my lines like show. You know all those things, that's how fred came in. He came in fully prepared and and he's just he's, just wonderful, really beautiful in the movie. How were you raise round that? Did your father used to tell you how to behave within the profession he will. He would take me into this that on you over seven years when I was on general hospital and he would give me act notes, sort of armenia. He fever

I could do better worded. He learn, and I don't know how None of you learn anything if you start when your nine a but I mean I would have thought that during the sixties there would have been some you know. Meeting with co chairs is doing Well, he was born in nineteen. Thirty, four, like back when you now tumble weeds, where all the rage, and so he was like a kid actor in the forties, which is crazy to me. What would that? What were his parents. that they would let him do that, I'm well. My grandfather was in vaudeville. He was a big vaudeville star, any tumblr and I actually and he died, of a brain tumor. So I put him in the when in my search engine in the book, when I start of which is actually very close to how I would search things, but I was a shtick I actually dont know my dad is given me.

Chapter of his book that I haven't had a chance to radiate called eddie and sally. My grandparents and all about them, doing these toward the orpheum circuit, and so you know my grandpa. Did may be one or two movies and then that and they were. I came out here. Yeah may in any way from the east coast No, they were. They were born here, yeah, some third generation from here through generation, showbiz, yeah now what's your mom do my mom? is musician. She plays a tall string, she's guitar, yeah she's, pretty awesome musician, songwriter serbs got any just just my sister, my half sister If you learned of later in your close yeah she's fuckin awesome she's a welder, she wilds heavy metal. She lives in san francisco, I cannot express you how exciting it was for me as a kid as terrified, as my die,

must have been to have a young seventeen year old, with green hair, not literally knock on the door and go hi, I'm your daughter for me. I had whose like poof like magic. It spent my whole life payment, barbie dolls and all my friends had siblings, and I suddenly had this cool teenage sister. played an electric guitar like pga harvey, who is an all girl, punk band called the kirby grips. It was like the the thing that could have ever happened. I was suddenly had this awesome. Older sister rebel angel delivered yes to save yeah, it's it's really really from old hippy stuff. Yes, here to take you out a happy land yeah exactly and what's your relationship with David lynch gave I know through my dog is my dad. Was an twin penis I but I don't really know I'm. I don't know anybody can really know him, but I just

written him, and I actually it's interesting because the poem for sure and tat in this book, I originally sent him that poem, because I thought that that would be the one that he would want to do the artwork for and he didn t he d was disturbed by it and actually, I think, had written. That's no small task to destroy. David lynch, the apples report that as well the poem is from the prospect, of her unborn child during the murder, which was in the only way in which I could poach that subject, I thought without it be. and taboo was to try to show that if you know, if I'm writing about the interior lives the metaphorical the interior lives of these women, why not do a poem? That's about the rural interior life as its happening as would be the only and on the only way to do it in which it wasn't brutal that you wouldn't have to talk about.

The terror that was going on outside of her body sort of like this weird reverse situation so from the perspective of the child on the inside as its happening and what their hearing and you know seeing these these holes light like stars coming through and but David David, I think he's I had said to me, I don't remember, but something about he didn't know why such a painful thing needed to be revisited like that which, as recipe was very surprised and sort of taken aback. I I thought for sure that was going to be his or he be into it, but he wasn't and then of course Marilyn Manson was like. Yes, that's the poem for me, but but David I knew briefly through just because of dad and doing twin peaks one for a moment. I thought he wasn't gonna do it. I heard this story with em I emailed and said that em it's true. I wasn't allowed to watch twin peaks. I was too young, but what I would do is the way my parents apartment is set up

or their tv was. I used to watch. I think it was on thursdays or something I used watch every single week. I you know corner quote: go to bed But then I went, I had a hello kitty mirror and I would stick it around the side of the door and I had watched the whole show on a hello kitty, mirror that's commitment, yeah so I told him that, and he is like god line, so they're both ok, your folks yeah and you get along with them the area very, very, very close with button. And now you're gonna go back home, upstate no Go back to brooklyn yeah, you guys toward the house of state. Yes, any other in Brooklyn yeah. That's nice so you see how much congressmen abstain. None. We can think of there once you know, but I had a direct direct, a move, and I need to play here without him, as he have to know he's he's here in l, a he's here now. Yeah are working on the thing yeah and then he goes to london to do another season of Todd Margaret really yeah they're doing a third season

it's what years later I know they have had a really good idea for how to make that happen and and it works for I have to get our success. Yeah. Ok! Well, it was great. Talking to you. Do you feel satisfied. I do I feel very good. Do you want to read a poem. Are your all your listeners enemy. Turning this offering a homo, no one. Would you re, maybe I'll? We read that bringing murphy honest short enough. I think as he slowly hands over the book. I like them being read. I shall read some icing Bernie murphy. Her body dies like, spiders in the shower the blooming flower seeds, a cemetery, a pill lodges in the inner pocket of her flesh coat her breasts where the gifts of ghosts dark tarps of success

her mouth rebels over onto the bathroom floor, pollack, blood, the body is lifted from the red carpet put in a black bag, Taken to the mothers screams for identification, the country says good things about the body they print the best photos. The least bones Most peach candles are lit in the glint of every glam. Every magazine stand. Does the southern bell curtsey in her post box office bomb honor the autopsy fines and easy answer. They say good things about the body. How bold her eyes were bigger than hepburn The way she could turn into her camera close up like life, depended on her you're doing good, though

I think great book, and I hope thanks mark and I'm glad you're you got through whatever it took nice to see you re too thanks that's it. That's the poetry discussion there, go it's a beautiful book, it's a hell of meditation gotta deputy up. Dot com, royal, w e f. pod needs. I pulled out to tell gaston anyone interested.

yeah.